Lending to Family Members Changes the Relationship

C. V. White Quote: (When you need something from someone you do not get to set the terms, or the conditions of the agreement.)

Lending to Family Members Changes the Relationship

One sure way to strain the relationship of a family member is to loan them some money and they may or may not be able to pay it back.  That lender/borrower is a business relationship not a family relationship.  As a result, when the borrower is expecting to be treated like a trusted family member, especially if there is a delay in repayment of the loan, they are often told this is business not a family matter or a friend matter, I want my money.  That is what puts the strain on the relationship; the loved and trusted family member or friend has now become a bill collector.  If you have never had a bill collector call you then you may not know what that is like. However, having to become a bill collector with family and friends should be avoided if possible.  The best way to handle it is to have guidelines that both parties agree to and understand so that the agreement will not be misunderstood by either party of what the responsibilities and expectations are to bring the original transaction to the expected end. Perhaps you should consider sowing a gift into their life if they have not proven to a  bad stewards of what comes into their hands. If you can and are willing that keeps the relationship clear and precise.



Growing Up Types – Is this somebody you know?

Who can love this creature, it looks as if it has two heads, but if you are patient you will see that this is  a very special butterfly that will develop from what looks like something you would want to stomp, into something that you would want to take a picture of. Patience is one of the characteristics of love.  Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. If you say you love someone, this has to be part of how you treat them.  This creature does not look like something you would want to be kind to, it is hoping that you will be patient long enough to see that it going through process and will become something new that you have never seen.  If you have someone in your life that appears to be going through process, be patient and kind long enough to see something in them you have never seen because that newness will be beautiful to behold.

Growing Up Types – Need a Quick Fix?

CV White Quote:  (Trying to do somethings too quickly generates wait time, if you are really in a hurry slow down)

If you are a part of the Microwave generation, (people who like to accomplish everything quick and in a hurry), remember some things have to cook slowly. Relationships are like that, whether it is making a new friend, an espousal (anticipating marriage), coworkers etc., it takes time to get to know a person, therefore relationships need to be put in the oven and baked slowly so that both sides of the face of the persons can be seen because it takes approximately six months for a person to relax enough to show you who they really are and this is true for you also. Nobody can pretend forever. Give them time to be who they are and then you can decide if you can handle this person in this relationship. Remember, if this is going to work you have to let them be who they are and like it otherwise this relationship is not going to last. It is going to take the caterpillar some time to become a butterfly so if you want to know what it is going to look like in its final stage you are going to have to wait and see.

Growing Up Types – Processed life.

You have got to get livid about what you need to change and correct in your life (you have to go through the process) before you can live it (live better than before).  Going around in circles and cycles is not conducive for a well-balanced fulfilled life.  Make the change and decide that going through process to get there is for your own good.  Metamorphosis for butterflies is a process to get to an expected end.

If you need to continue your education, do that.  If you need to get rid of bad habits, do that.  If you need to make new friends, do that.  If you need to read more, do that.  You know what you need to do to make your life better than it is today, do that.  If you need to think about what you need to do, then you have already missed the point.